Chapter 17: The Aurum Brain/Transcript

The following is a transcript for the English version of Chapter 17: The Aurum Brain.

Air Battle
(Pit rushes to the door to start the level.)

Pit: Let's finish the Aurum once and for all!

(Pit leaps through the door.)

Hades: Commencing Underworld assault on the Aurum central nervous system!

Viridi: Children! Our final target is the brains behind this operation! The Aurum Brain!

Pyrrhon: Sun god Pyrrhon on the scene! Now with added Pyro Cannon action!

Palutena: With all us gods—er, and Pyrrhon—united, the Aurum Brain doesn't stand a chance.

Pit: It's kind of crazy! The biggest egos in the universe working together?

Hades: Drive the intruders back into space, minions!

Viridi: We cannot lose! Our planet's very existence is on the line!

Pyrrhon: Do your thing, Pyro Snake! Shazammitylam!

Pit: Everyone seems to be in good spirits, though.

Palutena: Or they've finally lost it.

(The Aurum Brain Fortress comes into view.)

Palutena: Now that we've defeated the Aurum Hive, we need to take down that fortress.

Pit: It's huge!

Palutena: It houses the Aurum Brain, which controls every single Aurum unit.

Pit: How did you know that?

Palutena: Oh, Pyrrhon told me.

Pit: Man, is that guy obsessed with the Aurum or what? He sure knows a lot about them.

Pyrrhon: That's because I spend a lot of time on Divinipedia.

Pit: Divinipedia? Send me the link.

Pyrrhon: The time for learning has passed. Attack the Aurum Brain!

(Pit approaches an opening in the fortress.)

Pit: I'm heading in!

Pyrrhon: This path will take us directly to the Aurum Brain. Come on, Pit! It's time for us to take this space junk to the space dump!

(Pit flies into a room containing the Aurum Brain.)

Pit: So this is the Aurum Brain...

Pyrrhon: Do your thing, Pit. You know, your...shooting thing.

(After a brief battle, Pyrrhon flies in close to the Aurum Brain.)

Pyrrhon: It's brain-frying time!

Pit: What are you doing?!

(Pyrrhon flies into the center of the Aurum Brain.)

Palutena: Hold on, Pit! I'm getting you out!

(The room begins to explode as Palutena flies Pit away.)

Pit: Waaaaaaaah!

Palutena: Just a little farther!

(Palutena flies Pit out of the fortress.)

Pit: I don't know what even happened in there! Did Pyrrhon make it out?

Pyrrhon: Ha ha ha ha ha! HA HA HA HA HA HA! Nicely done!

(A large projection of Pyrrhon appears before Pit.)

Pit: Pyrrhon?

Pyrrhon: Thanks to you, Pyrrhon has leveled up! I am now a Level Infinity Epic Super God...Plus! Ultimate power is now Pyrrhon's!

Pit: What are you talking about?

Pyrrhon: This is what I'm talking about!

(Aurum troops fly toward Pit, their green forms turning red.)

Pit: The Aurum troops changed color!

Pyrrhon: HA HA HA HA HA HA! I'm pulling the Aurum strings now! Not even the combined power of the gods can stop me!

Hades: Oh, snap! Poor Pitty got duped!

Viridi: This might not be the best time to rub salt in the wound.

Pit: What kind of rat tricks an angel, Pyrrhon?

Pyrrhon: What?! I can't hear you over all this awesome!

(Pit continues to fight off Aurum troops.)

Pit: Yow! This is intense!

Hades: So, anyone have any bright ideas on how to take him out?

Viridi: I suppose we have no choice. This is it, my single remaining jewel.

(A large, bright object descends from the sky and toward the fortress.)

Pit: Wait a second... Is that a RESET BOMB?!

Viridi: Time to let nature take its course!

(The Reset Bomb crashes into the fortress and expands into a Reset Bomb Forest.)

Pit: This is out of control!

Viridi: Who's awesome now, Pyrrhon?!

Pyrrhon: HA HA HA HA HA HA! Is that really all you've got?

(The Reset Bomb Forest bursts into flames.)

Viridi: How could this happen?!

Palutena: I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the power of flight is running out.

Pit: So now what?

Palutena: I'm sorry, Pit. I have to get you out of there.

(A light shines down over Pit, but nothing happens and he remains in his spot.)

Palutena: Oh no!

Viridi: What's wrong?

Palutena: I can't extract him. I don't understand why.

Pyrrhon: That's because you don't have an associate's degree in telepathic interference!

Palutena: Are you blocking me?

(Pit's wings start to catch fire.)

Pit: My wings are getting hot!

Palutena: I'm sorry! I can't carry you any farther! I have to cut off the power of flight!

(Palutena stops granting Pit the power of flight, sending him falling toward the surface.)

Pit: Waaaaah!

Palutena: Pit! PIT!

Pit: Mayday! Mayday! This looks like the end! I never learned how to reeeeead!

Viridi: Ugh, pull yourself together! I've got you covered.

Pit: Viridi!

Viridi: All you have to do is line yourself up with the platform below.


 * [If Pit fails to align himself with the platform.]


 * Pit: Waaaaaaah!


 * Viridi: Well, that went poorly.

Land Battle
(Pit lands on the platform Viridi sent in.)

Pit: Ouch...

Palutena: Whew, I'm glad you're all right.

Pit: But why did you save me, Viridi? I don't get it.

Viridi: There's nothing to get. Just shut your yapper and get ready to fight!

Palutena: By invading our land, the Aurum have declared war on all of us. And with Pyrrhon on their side, they've become even more powerful! If we don't defeat them today, we may not have a tomorrow.

Viridi: Ugh, do you ever get tired of being such a nerd? All you need are twenty-sided dice and some thick glasses.

Palutena: My X-ray specs allow me to see your ignorance.

Viridi: Yeah yeah, enough with the lame comedy routine. It's time for us to strike!

Pit: This isn't much space to fight on.

Viridi: Picky picky! Maybe this will suit His Majesty a little better.

(Forces of Nature troops fly in with another platform, connecting it with the previous one to make one large platform.)

Pit: Thanks! This is MUCH better!

Palutena: It looks like Viridi has also donated some of her forces to carry the platform. But this platform is bigger, so there's more room for enemies. Stay on your guard!

(An Aurum Aircraft Carrier flies overhead.)

Palutena: That Aurum ship flying overhead is the size of a continent!

Hades: If it were me, I wouldn't sweat it.

Palutena: Enemies incoming, Pit!

Pit: Get your own platform, jerks!

Viridi: That Aurum ship is going to engulf your entire platform!

(The Aurum Aircraft Carrier lowers itself over Pit, placing him inside the ship.)

Pit: Augh! I'm trapped!

Viridi: Aurum vermin!

Hades: They're well coordinated, I'll give them that.

Palutena: Be careful, Pit! Those walls are extremely hot!

Viridi: Children! Full speed ahead! Hyah!

(Pit approaches a Dohz.)

Palutena: There's an Aurum Dohz ahead blocking your way! Get rid of it!


 * [If Pit successfully defeats the Dohz.]


 * Viridi: All right!


 * Pit: My thoughts exactly!


 * (Pit exits the ship.)


 * Pit: I made it out of the ship!


 * Palutena: Good job, but there are enemies closing in from all directions. Watch out!


 * Hades: Our little sun buddy must have a thing for you, Pit.


 * Viridi: Of course he does. Pit's the only one that loon considers an equal.


 * [If Pit fails to defeat the Dohz.]


 * Viridi: Drat! I guess you have to go around.


 * Pit: That's one tough customer!


 * (Pit exits the ship.)

(A Kolma lands on Pit's platform.)

Pit: Ugh!

Palutena: Looks like you've got company.

Viridi: That Kolma is trying to scam a free ride! What a deadbeat!

Hades: Attention, passengers! Those who fail to pay their fare must exit the vehicle.

(The platform crashes into an Aurum Destroyer.)

Pit: Whoaa!

Viridi: You've got a battleship on your tail!

(Another Aurum Destroyer crashes into the platform's opposite side.)

Pit: Hoo boy!

Palutena: And one on your front!

Viridi: You're being sandwiched!

Hades: Ah, yes, the old sandwich tactic. How delectable!

Viridi: Shut up, Hades. Forces of Nature! Push that platform up and out of there!

(The platform rises, freeing Pit from the Destroyers.)

Viridi: Good! You broke free!

Pyrrhon: HA HA HA HA HA! I see you're hard at work!

Pit: Pyrrhon!

Pyrrhon: Pyrrhon Creed Number 427: Hard work should always be rewarded! Which is why I got a present. For me. To destroy you. It's Pyroblaster time!

Pit: Huh?! Uh-oh!

Viridi: Hold on!

(A large, fiery beam suddenly shoots out from the fortress and connects with the side of the platform.)

Pit: Augh!

Viridi: Come on, Pit! No wimping out!

(The beam dissipates.)

Viridi: See? You're fine. Though I can't say the same for my troops that were carrying your platform.

Pit: I feel terrible about this.

Palutena: Our Forces of Nature allies made the ultimate sacrifice. But there's no point dwelling. I called for backup.

(The platforms falls from beneath Pit, sending him falling again.)

Pit: Whoa whoa!

(Centurion Strongarms fly by.)

Pit: Centurions?!

(Pit lands on the platform again, which is now being carried by Centurion Strongarms.)

Pit: Whew. That was close.

Centurion Strongarm: Glad to see you're safe, Captain!

Pit: The centurions are in way over their heads!

Palutena: They mean well. They're just not very effective.

Viridi: Pretty harsh words for your own troops.

Pit: Pull them out! I don't want them to get hurt!

Palutena: Then how do you plan to make it to Pyrrhon?

Pit: I-I'll think of something!

Centurion Strongarm: We live to serve, Captain! Your mission is to defeat Pyrrhon and eliminate the Aurum forces! We dedicate our energy and resources to helping you reach that goal!

Pit: ...OK, OK. Then charge, soldiers!


 * [If the first Centurion Strongarm falls.]


 * Centurion Strongarm: Ow-oooooh!


 * Pit: Oh, no! We lost a centurion!


 * Palutena: If you lose them all, you won't be able to proceed. And you'll feel very guilty.


 * Pit: I'll be more careful!


 * [If the second Centurion Strongarm falls.]


 * Centurion Strongarm: Aaaaaaugh!


 * Pit: What have I done?! All the centurions are...are...


 * Palutena: Actually, um... I have two more.


 * Pit: What?! Don't scare me like that!


 * Palutena: But these are the last of them. So, seriously. Be careful this time.


 * [If the third Centurion Strongarm falls.]


 * Centurion Strongarm: Ooooo-hoo-augh!


 * Palutena: There's only one centurion left, Pit! Guard him with your life!


 * [If the last Centurion Strongarm falls.]


 * Centurion Strongarm: Oooh-egh!


 * Pit: So—heh heh—you were just kidding about having no more centurions, right?


 * Palutena: No... I was serious.


 * Pyrrhon: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Your game, my friend, is SO OVER!

Palutena: It seems as if our previous path into the Aurum Brain is, well, aflame.

Hades: You can thank Pyrrhon for that.

Palutena: You'll have to go around.

(The platform approaches an opening.)

Centurion Strongarm: Going in!

Palutena: You've got Aurum enemies on your tail!

(The Centurion Strongarms carry the platform inside the fortress.)

Centurion Strongarm: There's an obstacle ahead!

Pit: Keep moving forward! I'll take care of it!

Palutena: Jump over the lasers to avoid getting hit!

Viridi: They're coming from the battleship outside.

Hades: Ahh, alien ingenuity at its best.

Viridi: We're closing in on Pyrrhon!

Hades: I hope he's decent.

Palutena: Get it together, Pit! My poor centurions are struggling. Destroy those enemies NOW!

Pit: I'm trying my best!

Viridi: Some goddess needs to go to leadership training...

Palutena: Pyrrhon is right up ahead!

Pyrrhon: Halt. Halt. Stay. Away.

Pit: Does something seem a little off about Pyrrhon?

Palutena: How can you even tell?

Boss Battle
(Two Centurion Strongarms carry Pit's platform into the boss room where he encounters Pyrrhon, who is fused into the surface of the Aurum Brain and twitching massively.)

Aurum Pyrrhon: 01101011011010010110110001101100...

Pit: Pyrrhon! What are you doing?!

(The battle initiates.)

Pit: Are you really controlling the Aurum, Pyrrhon? Or are they controlling you?!

Aurum Pyrrhon: I... I... I will not be controlled... > WE WILL NOT BE CONTROLLED

Pit: Oh, boy. What's he gotten himself into?

Palutena: It's just as you suspected. The Aurum Brain has overtaken Pyrrhon.

Aurum Pyrrhon: > INTRUDER MUST BE PURGED > WE MUST CONSUME ALL

Hades: Just like bugs, the Aurum are powerful as a swarm, but not very bright.

Palutena: They're like moths drawn to the flame of battle. They live only to consume and destroy, like...hungry moths.

Aurum Pyrrhon: > WE WILL MULTIPLY > WE MUST BE ALL

Viridi: In that sense, they're pretty much like any other living creature. They're concerned with their own survival and propagation. Each species influences the other, and THAT is the cycle of life! But this... This is just too much. It's too destructive and too unnatural!

Palutena: Well, they are an alien species. Of course they're not natural.

Pit: So they're just going to eat everything?!

Palutena: Not if you stop them!

Palutena: Just keep jumping and shooting to avoid Pyrrhon's attacks. However, you can't do powerful dash attacks while you're in the air.

Viridi: Then I guess you need to balance jumps with dash attacks. Pay attention to Pyrrhon's attack patterns to time your attacks. Let him have it!

Aurum Pyrrhon: > YOU CANNOT STOP US!

(Pit defeats Aurum Pyrrhon.)

Pit: Go back to space!

Aurum Pyrrhon: > RAAAAAAAAAAWR

Epilogue
(Aurum Pyrrhon begins to explode.)

Pit: Wah!

Palutena: I need to extract you!

(The Centurion Strongarms quickly carry Pit away from the room.)

Pit: This seems familiar.

Palutena: We've been doing this a lot.

(Pit narrowly makes it out before the explosion engulfs the interior of the fortress. Aurum Pyrrhon then uses his power to launch himself, and the fortress, back into space.)

Palutena: With any luck, Pyrrhon will push the Aurum to the other end of the galaxy.

Viridi: He finally does something useful.

Palutena: Now we can get back to eliminating the real enemy. The Underworld Army.

Pit: So long, space scum!